Figuring it Out!

We were in New Jersey for the past several days for our best man Mike's oldest brothers funeral. Sadness. The most sad thing for me wasn't that he's dead (he was 38) it's the fact that, from what I've been told and heard at the funeral, the guy was a huge partyer, drank a lot, drove a motorcycle recklessly (thus the reason for his passing), super charismatic, lots of friends, everyone seemed to think he was their best friend, and yet there was a totally different side of him around his family. His friends seemed more distraught and hysterical than the family and kept saying how he lived his life to the fullest not afraid of death and that he died doing what he did, living life to the fullest. Knowing how he died, I can't say that's how I imagine or define living life to the fullest, and most people I know wouldn't either. But perhaps that's the only way to define it when you don't know Christ...living life to fill it...

Anyway, it was wonderful to be there for Mike and spend time with the family, one we love and have been adopted by. I finally feel I fit in and have been accepted for who I am and not just as Chris' wife. It will be another home and homes are so needed.

We then went to church on Sunday and Chris and his dad afterward had some guy time at Waterfest, the largest VW show in the U.S; his mom and I went to a church picnic and then spent time together talking and shopping to get stuff for our beach trip the next day. I'm glad I got to spend it with her. We're still getting to really know each other and build a good relationship.

I knew I needed a day at the beach but didn't realize it until we got there! Oh it was soooo hot laying out on the sand in the sun but if I sat up I could feel the breeze and it was wonderful! I laughed and giggled as we played in the water trying to see if we could make it up over the waves before the broke on top of us...yes, I ate it a couple times ;) But I so needed it! We played and laughed and it was such a retreat! Then we got to go to a seafood dinner on the water, it felt like a mini-vaca one which we've desperately needed and couldn't afford, so thanks for planning that treat Mom and Dad C.

We ended up so sunburnt!! We're still feeling it today and it itches on top of hurting and we're already peeling on our faces! I've never peeled so quickly in my life! My poor hubby, he usually doesn't burn much and in our excitement he forgot to put sunscreen on above his knees while he sat in a chair on the sand, he's now hurting a bit...fortuantely I've been down this road before and can offer my expertise! lol

Now he's off to worship team practice and I have some time to make phone calls, read a book that is amazing and evoking some emotions I haven't felt in awhile. All in all I realized today I had a choice. Stop worrying about everything going on right now and who's thinking what and that I'm still lonely and missing home and not wanting to do much and being suspicious of things based off past experience, and start enjoying my life!

I like where I live. I like it better now that I feel like I can build a life here rather than being upset that I still don't have one. God has a purpose for me and although I don't have to know how everything is supposed to go and I would like to at least have a goal, something to work towards and keep me motivated, I don't have to. I need to keep seeking him in relationship and that's what I need to keep my eyes on, not- am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing? am I doing it 'right'? who am I pleasing or displeasing?

As my book puts it: "If obedience and service is flowing out of you as a result of your dependence on God alone, you won't keep track of it with an eye toward reward, you'll just do it. But if you're preoccupied with wherther you've done enough to please God, then you're not looking at Him, you're looking at your own works. And you're also concerned about who else might be looking at you, evaluating you."

These are things I've learned through hurts and other things along the way, but I'm ready to lay aside the issues that I've allowed to be bigger than my God or my trust in my God. A new day waits by God's grace! And I'm more motivated to do new things! I'm excited by life again! Maybe I'll take a class at a community college or something I don't know, but it sounds like fun and it sounds like a step towards accepting where I live and where I'm at and trusting God's purpose for this time!

I'll write soon! I like it, it's such a wonderful outlet!
♥ dani

Settling in...

We've now been here a little over 2 weeks now and I must admit it is a little strange.  We have friend connections here but somehow I feel a little detached from it all.  There are times when it seems to sink in and others where it is familiar but foreign.

I'm trying to figure out what I'm doing here.  I'm supposed to be here but I want a job that I am HAPPY with and i figure it's ok to want that since i have the opportunity to look for that.  I just wish I knew what it was...i wonder what my role is here...i like not having a job but i would get bored so easily so i want one i enjoy.  any ideas for what i'd be good at or might enjoy?

I have decided my guest room is a great retreat!  I can look out the windows and see the squirrels leaping from tree to tree and fight for lunch...i can loo at the trees and hear the rain.  All in all it is quite soothing.

Chris and I are doing good and having lots of fun together.  And I'm still on CA time.  It's not adjusting!!!  It has to before I start working!

That's it for the moment, I don't really know what else to put right now!  Oh yeah!  Chris and I have been married for 2 years this last Wednesday!!  We're in our 3rd year now!  Wow!  We went to Lake Norman which is huge and spent the day exploring and having a fantastic dinner on the water.

Talk to you soon!

♥

          dani

So, We're Here...

Ok it's official, we now currently reside in Charlotte, NC. We moved in May 9, 2009 and were greeted by an incredible group of people both from the church we're attending: Ryan, Rachel, Levi, Pastor Bill, Andrew and Megan (Ryan's brother and his fiancee) and then there was my Dad in law's best friend Mr. Lanno who rallied some of the men from his Bible study and came to our aid. All of these people were amazing. Chris' parents were there too and were an immense help.

All in all, the truck was unloaded and sorted in an hour or less!! It was the fastest move in I've ever seen!!















And my lovely CA plant with pretty flowers made it all the way. It even bloomed in the truck!!! And yes that's the view from my deck...and my dining room...and my bedroom...and my guest room. This is my tree house.

We're still settling in but we painted one wall (which i don't have the photo downloaded on the computer yet) it's pretty and i love it!! We've also enjoyed our days doing furniture shopping, we bought a beautiful cherry wood sleigh bed with waterfall patterned wood. Again I see i have more photos to share! We've also unpacked most of our kitchen and we're getting ready to move in a desk we purchased as well. Both the desk and the bed were God-given deals. It makes me feel a little more established now.


I still miss home, tho I do fairly well for the most part. But if anyone asks me in person how I'm doing, I can't help but tear up. What else could you expect? I just left the only home I'd known and my incredible family who became some of our best friends and support system. A family who did not have a son and now does not a son-in-law, a family where a mother and daughter are dear friends, a family where sisters who grew up not getting along are best friends and a family where a daddy still dances with his little girl to the father-daughter song from her wedding when it comes on the radio.

I cry because I'm sad, because I love them, because I miss them and in honor of them and their place in our lives.

So, now that I've made myself cry lol ;0) , I'll move on. We're starting to look for jobs tho not in too much of a hurry so we can settle in and enjoy the fact that we won't really have too many opportunties in our lifetimes to be neither employed, doing ok financially, and getting to spend time we enjoy together having just moved and depending on one another.

Sorry it took so long to update I will try to do better as our ENDEAVORS continue...

To all of you who have read this and been a part of our lives through this time be it thru encouraging notes, face to face talks, phone calls, etc. we thank you. We could not have as easily followed God's call and leading in our lives without you. He gave us you and we hope that when those times come for you, you know we will be with you at least in heart and prayer. Stay in touch!!

♥ dani

Moving...

So this is the first of probably many or at least several posts. In the last 3 days we have crossed CA, NV, UT, WY and are now residing with wonderful friends in beautiful Colorado... we have seen a number of interesting things and in the middle of all of it i'm wrestling with homesickness, lonliness in the middle of barren landscapes, but it was good to land at a wonderful home with incredible friends. It's so homey and cozy. I could live here sometime...we move on tomorrow to who knows where, we never know where we'll stop until we get there. I'll keep you posted with new stuff and more details! I'll post some photos too!


♥ Dani

Processing

So today and actually most of the earlier part of yesterday I've been processing a lot of things in my head and heart. I'm processing a lot of what we've been through in the last year and half and that's because I feel like the Lord is about to close the door on all of that so that I can move on with the rest of his plan for me. That required some deep heart searching.

Chris and I are moving at the end of April to North Carolina. We know that the Lord has called us there for a number of reasons and it has been confirmed for us, but there is so much that is going on in my heart regarding this especially because of the little time we have left here. We will be in NJ visiting Chris' family, which I have no problem with and am looking forward to, but definitely aware I won't get to see my family in that time and that brings me to what I'm processing most today. I'm grieving leaving my family with whom we are so close and have such a great relationship both individually and together.

There are a number of things to do before that time. So I'm just deep in thought, but I am also very aware that my Papa is indescribably close and teaching me so much in the meantime.

I have some fun things to write about that I'll post soon! It's a beautiful rainy day and I'm not going to waste it!

♥
Dani

Getting Started

So today I'm getting started on blogging.

I've been in the process of setting this up since we have so many changes going on in our lives, it will give you a chance to follow, keep up and get a corner window view into my heart and life. I already have so many things to write about so I'll do my best to stay on top of it. Please feel free to pull up a chair, grab something to drink and stay and visit, I like company!

♥
Dani